like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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