yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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