I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize