stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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