I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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