I wanna passion pit in your ass
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
