And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
