3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
