I must be too annoying 4 u.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize
