Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
