We're facebook friends in real life
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
