youre lurking in front of me
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
