Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize