Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize