Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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