A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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