Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize