He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
