You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
