his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
