I look better un-naked...
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
