If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize