He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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