similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
