the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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