The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
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