So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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