you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
