I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
