do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
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