is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
