We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
