so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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