Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize