i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize