Buhtt sex?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
