Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
