Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
