Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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