I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize