carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
