return my video game
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
