just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I have peed in a lot of sinks
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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