you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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