I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
