think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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