we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
