The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
