It's Friday. Sex?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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