i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
